The Hand that Leads

Holding hands.

It’s something my husband has always done with me.  We do it a lot less now having kids since it generally requires both hands to be taking care of them, but one place we can generally always hold hands is in the car.  Without him knowing, whenever he grabs mine or I grab his, I am mindful to make sure that his hand is the one on top.  Sound weird?  Well it might be, but I want to share with you my reasoning behind why I do that…

I can’t remember when it was or who was talking, but it was one of those little breaks in the music on the radio where they talk about a recent study or just some random useless knowledge.  This one was kind of interesting to me.  They were talking about holding hands.  They proceeded to say that in this study of people holding hands, they noticed that the more dominate person was generally the one with their hand on top.

That got me thinking, “I wonder who’s hand is on top when we hold hands!?”  I had no idea who’s it was because I am not the most observant person in the world.  🙂  I wish I did just for the fun of it, but one thing I knew was from that point forward, I was going to make sure that my Husband’s hand was going to be the one on top.

Sound silly?  Well it may be, but to me it serves as a little reminder every time we hold hands of how much I should value, honor, respect, and love my Husband as my God given leader.

I love that he is my leader. I want him to lead me in simple ways; like when we walk into the Church building and he decides where we will sit or by picking out where we are going to eat.  I want to be lead.  I make a conscious effort to let him lead me the most he can because I want to condition myself to follow him.  When times get difficult and there are bigger decisions to be made, it will be hard, so I want to be practiced in letting him lead.  Yes, I have a say, and yes, he listens to me.  But in the end, whether I helped in making the decision or not, he is the leader and his decision rules. I want to support him.  Ultimately, what I want is to do my best in my God given role as my Husband’s Wife and helper.  I can’t help him and we can’t move forward together if we are both trying to lead.  It is my duty as his Wife to yield to him so we can move on and move forward together.

So this still may sound just plain crazy to you, but for me, I love it.  With my hand in his, I want to follow where he leads.


  1. I always tell my husband “I follow you blindly”. Always. If we are looking for the car in the parking lot I make that statement to lighten the mood. When we are making real life, hard decisions, I make that statement to let him know that I KNOW he will make the best choice for our family and I will support him no matter what.
    I trust him in everything, even if others think its not the smartest thing for me to do. He is my PERSON and God handpicked him for me so I will go where he leads me.

    1. Aww I Love this Zhade! What an awesome way to communicate to him that you trust him and will follow him by having a simple phrase that you both know! I’m sure he really cherishes that in you!

  2. I was just reading some of your posts since I found you on here and oh my gosh YES! I thought I was the only one that did this. I told my husband when we were still dating his hand should go on top because he is the one that leads. In life and faith. Love this so much girl!

    1. That is so wonderful! It does my heart good to know that there are still women out there like you! Keep it up! God’s way for the married couple is perfect, we just need to be humble enough to do it!

  3. I really love this post! I know yielding to my husband is something I struggle with at time. I’ve been praying to God to help me be more mindful of the things I do in my role as a wife. Your post really encourages me!

    1. Praying is always one of the best things to do in my opinion! It definitely hard at times but praying about it keeps me mindful of it and I remember that ultimately it is God that I am yielding to. It’s his design and He knows best! You are already doing great by recognizing what you are supposed to do! Most women don’t even want to acknowledge this subject! It can be a beautiful thing! We just have to put our pride down! Thank you for your honest and lovely heart!

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